Why it’s okay to not know your purpose – yet

Hey Guys! What’s new? How are you doing?

So, as this is my last post of the year, I really wanted to talk about all the amazing things I’ve learnt. But what stood out to me was realising that it’s okay to not fully know my  purpose – yet. And why this is so important for encouraging growth, optimism and courage…

2017.

What can I say? You’ve been good to me. God has been ever more faithful. But my biggest lesson was finally understanding the true meaning of my purpose.

But let’s delve in, in true Sosa Sharon style, with a definition:

Purpose-def

So, to have purpose, is to have an intention or reason why you are doing something. You are determined to do this through continuous action and meeting targets. This can be a plan to save a particular amount of money or lose some weight. The point is, you stay looking ahead to complete something you set out to do.

At the beginning of the year, I didn’t really feel like I had a purpose, and to figure that out I decided to start a blog. I loved to write and it gave me a chance to finally to put down the many thoughts that ruminate in my head and find a community of writers to connect with. It was my own little passion project to give me some kind of direction.

You could find me sketching out topics like:

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But I still couldn’t figure out what content I wanted to post. I was seeing lots of other blogs find their niche and excel in doing it, but I literally had no clue! I knew it would be something along the lines of embracing who you are and self care, but still, I didn’t feel grounded. In the end I wrote about what intrigued me, but desired to find a general theme.

Anyway, feeling a bit lost in doing that, I moved on to photography. I wanted to expand to my creative repertoire and maybe add a few pics to my blog. I bought myself a cool camera and asked my friends and family to be my subjects.

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I loved doing that, and gained some skills as well, but that eventually fell to the wayside.

But I was still on my journey to self-improvement and decided to take up something else.

Hair.

Now, I love hair. It’s literally one of my favourite things. I interned in the marketing department of a hair care brand and quite enjoyed learning more about it. I also knew how to make wigs, so I thought maybe it was time to make that my hustle. But after making a few wigs, gained a temporarily crooked back from all the bending and washing, some bruised up fingers from stabbing myself with the sewing needle, and with some nice change to match, I stopping focusing on it as much (still holla if you want a wig though!)

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So, essentially, I was all over the place. My creative tentacles and body were stretching so far that I got lost in the sauce. I hadn’t actually carved out a niche for myself and was starting projects to not finish them.

I felt tired and frustrated that I still hadn’t figured out what MY thing was. And until I found it, I would be lost and left behind.

Many of us can end up feeling that way, especially as a young adult. It can sometimes feel like you’re not only competing with yourself but with your peers too. When things don’t go right, de-motivation creeps in and so does self doubt.

For me, that’s exactly what happened.

I had tried many endeavours, both in my professional and personal life, to figure out exactly what I had been called to do.

But it wasn’t until I sat down and truly evaluated all the things I had been doing, that I realised I was actually finding myself.

Now I know you’re thinking, “Well, duh, of course you were finding yourself. What else were you doing? Haven’t you written about this already?” But the truth is, I didn’t know I could do half of the things I achieved in the past year.

I didn’t know I could be (somewhat) consistent enough to start a blog. I didn’t know I could actually use my knowledge of hair to make money. I didn’t know I could learn to take photos. I also didn’t know I could do some of these things simultaneously.

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So, in searching for my purpose, I found the many other things I’m really good at. Things that I could continue doing and thrive in until I feel like I’ve hit the ‘jack-pot’ of purposes. And this is extremely important thing to do.

Our amazing aunty, Serena Williams believes in having your hands in many pots: “Venus Williams never talks about this lightning bolt where she gets her life purpose. She just says ‘I’m interested in that, I’m going to explore that,’ ” says motivation author Jeff Haden. “There’s this idea that if you switch paths, you wasted the time you spent on that previous thing, but your path doesn’t seem clear until you look back and connect the dots.”

Serena’s achievements span from athleticism into design, education and entrepreneurship, as an example of the advantages of being open to new things. By doing this she is allowing her purpose to evolve and lead her to greener pastures.

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One recent study also found that people who engage in different tasks throughout the day display more creative problem-solving skills. Neurologists think this is because the brain likes it when you try new things — or, perhaps conversely, because the brain gets sluggish when you do the same thing for too long, according to an article in MIC.

So, I was actually doing myself a great favour by trying out so many different things. I was widening my circle by meeting new people through all my new ventures as well as becoming more self-assured.

The self-doubt, however, was really a result of not giving my achievements any recognition and holding on hard on the notion of having a ‘single’ purpose. But in acknowledging them, hope crept back in and I felt more confident in the things I was already doing.

And have I now found my purpose, you ask? Not at all. But what I do know, is that I’m great at many things and ultimately what I put my mind to, I can excel at.

Sure I didn’t find my ‘niche’, but the gag is, my niche is actually being me. The bubbly, determined, sometimes all over the place, but good-hearted person I am.

See you in 2018!

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sosa3

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4 thoughts on “Why it’s okay to not know your purpose – yet

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