So I was thinking about how sometimes we love people so much, but they only reciprocate the love as long as it’s convenient. I’m here to remind you that this kind of love is never worth it and how you can spot it…
Okay, so what exactly is convenient love? (Definition time!)
So, this kind of love is usually shown when it suits the person. It also tends to be easy to love someone this way, as they aren’t really going out of their way to do it. They may only show this kind of love when times are good, this can be career-wise, finance-wise etc…
What happens then, is that person A, receiving person B’s love (the convenient kind) is at the mercy of what is currently happening in B’s life. For example, if B isn’t in a good place, then they won’t love you properly. That includes being there for you when times are tough. It’s not just romantic either, it can be between friends, family, colleagues, mentors and lovers.
That person fails to pick up your calls in hours of need. Doesn’t support your dreams or desires. Hardly puts you first and if they do its only when it’s right for them. There’s no serious commitment, growth or inclusion. As harsh as it sounds, you’re just an afterthought in their world. An addition that they can do without.
You see, you’re like a temporary tattoo. You’re needed for a particular look, not longterm.
But don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you should be anybody’s entire world. That’s narcissistic and unfair. You should however, never be used by someone and just dropped as and when.
And convenient love isn’t actually love.
Real, authentic and genuine love is actually:
The Bible got it just right – the key thing that made this kind of love so pure was commitment:
“You are committing to someone’s whole self. You are not just committing to them under the condition that they stay young and beautiful — because they will not. And neither will you. You are not just committing to them until someone better comes along — you are committing to the idea while neither they nor your relationship is perfect — this is the person you want to be with. You are committing to their very being. To the idea that the two of you are the consistent center and your circumstances simply orbit around you.” James Michael Sama
So love endures, especially through the hardest times. It is there to serve the other person as much as it possibly can, to enrich their life for the better. This type of love will support you. Guide you, correct you and stays with you. It filters into your life helping you to grow as a person.
Any other type of ‘love’ is either toxic or simply convenient. I’ll spare you the spiel on how this can affect you physically, mentally and spiritually because I’ve already written about this ready for you>>>> here!
But of course the real of it is, is that many of us fall out of love with each other. Life may get in the way and you’re forced to part. But the love that existed between you two, was like a Corinthians type of love, and it did what it could until it couldn’t no more. You’ll look back fondly back on times together and recognise the realness of it all, the benefit of having that person in your life.
So, I urge you guys and dolls, to only allow real love in your lives and throw convenient love, in the trash. It’s harmful and negative in the long run and quite frankly you don’t need it.
only allow real love in your lives.
And if you’re ever struggling to figure out what kind of love it is, ask yourself, is it similar to a temporary tattoo?
P.S. I love hearing from you guys, have you ever experienced convenient love?